Where my Tyra Mail?

Oh my friends, I've discovered something wonderful. Something that will make your lives just that much better. Something that, until now, never held much appeal...

High thread count sheets.

After our old T-shirt sheets wore down to a scrap of fabric between holes, I decided it was time to break down and buy a second pair of sheets. I love to shop but there are some things that just don't give me the same thrill as, say, a really good Banana Republic sale rack. That list would include socks, pillows and yes, sheets. So I hauled myself to the home of all things discount, TJMaxx ("you should go"), and grabbed the first pair of plain white sheets I could find. Got them home, washed them, slapped them on the bed and ahhhhhahhhahhhhahhhahhhh! (That's supposed to be the sound of angels singing. I wasn't sure how to spell it.) 400 thread count equals 400... nicenities. I'll never go back to my shabby, muslin-like, 250 thread counters, I'll tell you that! (I read that Scarlett Johannson sleeps on 1000 count. Got to look into that...)

In the meantime, I need to make some money. I've started doing daily affirmations in order to align the universe with the desires of my mind. While I'm not 100% sold that just by saying something you manifest it I'm also not about to go fucking around with the powers of the universe. (Hi Universe! Love ya!) So I've been saying my affirmations ten times a day - "I make $100,000 a year doing commecials" - and so far, so good. Not that I've made a penny on my commercial yet, but by God I will! (10,000,000 pennies to be precise.)

The problem is, I keep waffling about the amount of money I'm affirming for. Is $100,000 enough? Maybe I should make it $200,000. ($100,000 is nice, but $200,000 is better. Some would say twice as better.) But what if by capping the amount, I'm not allowing the universe to give me the next "Can You Hear Me Now?" campaign! And while $200,000 certainly isn't a bad salary, this is New YorkCity. (Maybe I should make it $3K...)

This is what occupies my brain, peeps. This, and who's going to take Project Runway. (I'm banking on Michael.)