Lions and paparrazi and jeers! Oh my!

Just think, Katie might be giving birth RIGHT NOW! (quietly. very quietly.) I find it hilarious that the reasoning behind Scientologists "silent birth" is because regular birth is psychological scarring. (Seems to me, being brought up in that church would do plenty of that.) They believe that if the child enters a world of noise and chaos it'll be damaged emotionally, after the calming silence of the womb. Anne Archer actually said (and I probably misquote) "If you say things like 'Push! Push!' it can have a negative effect on the child later on."

That's cracktastic.

Of course they're choosing to ignore the fact that it's PRETTY FARTING LOUD in the womb. Experts say it's louder than a vaccuum. At least Scientologists have clarified that the mother can make some noise and, thankfully, have drugs - just no talking. (Although complete silence - and no medication - is preferred.)

Clearly Tom had to go for a young'un. No self-respecting 30 year old would ever put up with this shit.

And kudos to Missy for grabbing this one! Now this is baby birthing, celebrity style. (Or superhero style. Or crazytown style, but I still love it.)