One! Two! Three!

HAPPY BIRTHD - Holy smokes, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!

Yes, friends, at 9:01 am CST I will be 92 years old. Man, the time sure does fly... It seems like only 34 years ago I was busy getting birthed, spanked on the ass and sent home to live with two great parents and a dog who tried to eat my face. (Actually, the dog might not have been around then.) Good times.

I feel like I should do something spectacular in this next 26 minutes of early mid-30dom. Can you bungee jump from the 12th floor? Can a "policeman" come a'knocking? (Bring on the tear-away pants!) Chances are I'll probably be cleaning out the cat litter box instead of holding my own personal parade but it's nice to dream.

I plan on going to the gym, seeing if I can get a massage, heading to Banana Republic with my $33 credit and $15 off coupon and having dinner with my man. Unless stripper-cop shows, that is.