Ah, the business we call "Show".

I went out for an industrial for a mental illness medication the other day. They actually faxed the sides over ahead of time which is unheard of. Once I got them I understood why - it was a full on monologue. The character was described as an actress, 35. "She's pacing, with large theatrical arm gestures. Something is definitely off."

At first I was all offended that I was being sent out for the mid-thirties character (versus the dewy skinned but unfortunately schitzophrenic 22-year-old) but then I caught sight of dreaded elbow droop and had to accept the truth. You can Botox and exercise all you want but nothing gives away your age like that tell-tale flap of skin.

The casting director was a sweet fella but seemed to have as much invested in his job as I do in dentistry. "Oooookay, remember that she is REAL so just make it very conversational. Like you're talking to your therapist."

"While pacing with large, theatrical arm gestures?" I helpfully smart assed.

"Mmm, yes."

The writer and producer were there (unusual for a first audition) seated behind two enormous cue cards. They told me the same thing as casting dude; conversational but crazy. But not too crazy. (But a little crazy.)

Righty.

So I started. I skipped the pacing part and just concentrated on the crazy. It was kind of fun, allowing myself to be as uninhibited as I absolutely can't in most theatrical auditions. They kept stopping me to tweak things; a little faster here, not so big here. It went well. They even checked if I was free on the shoot dates which is always a good sign. (The producer actually asked if I was certain that I wasn't going to book something recurring, referring to the SVU appearance on my resume. Uh, yeah, I'm sure...)

Got the call a few days ago - I'm on hold. It's not a booking, but my agent said it looked pretty likely.

Which means there's no way in hell I'm getting it.