Can I come to your barbeque?

Somebody's GOT to be having a b-b-q this weekend that I can crash! This whole "no barbeques on the balcony" b.s. chaps my hide. I live in a city where prostitution, crack, and grilling burgers are illegal. I have no problem with the illegality of crack, but burgers and whores should be free!

It's beautiful today. I'm stuck inside catching up on two weeks of missed Microsoft Word homework. Took me almost SEVEN HOURS last night. No one should have to spend seven hours dinking away on a computer unless they're getting paid time and a half. I just finished my midterm which was "open book and computer". (Do Google searches count as "open computer"? I say yes!) Now I'm going to the gym to try and erase two weeks worth of Midwestern cooking. I have never been surrounded by so much food! Americans throw food at grief and my mouth was happy to catch it. Gooey Butter Cake, burgers and shakes at Steak and Shake (it's healthy because it's steak! Right?), POUNDS of potato salad (one day, three different people brought it). Matt's aunt JoAnn puts bacon grease in everything. Even her carrot cake has lard. This makes everything exceptionally delicious but by the end of the visit I was getting winded going up the stairs.

Hope everyone has a decadant, delightful, delicious 4th. Pat a dog and eat some pie for me.