Where the free art?

I worked last night at Christie's auction house. Passing hors d'oeuvres to the fancy pants, whining about how long the party was, playing "Which Piece Would You Buy?" with the other waiters - the usual. The party must have been for their Young Buyer crowd because the average age was 30. It's always weird being in a subservient position to wealthy people, but when they're your age it's doubly awkward. They're never sure if they're supposed to treat you like the help or like a buddy, so they mostly just giggle and avert their eyes. I was serving a tray of stinky cheese paninis to a circle of sorority types when I overheard one of them discussing the piece she was planning on bidding on. It was a Rothko - one of my faves.

The starting price was $4.5 million.

Yeah, I know.

Not that she was the one big buyer in the group - the cheapest piece started at $500,000 - but it was just unbelievable to hear that someone my age had $4.5 million, much less $4.5 million to spend. One of the girls in the group asked Miss Moneybags what she did for a living; she hesitated for a second before her friend piped in with, "She's trying to figure out how to put it..." I was dying to hear the answer but there's only so long you can linger with a tray of stinky cheese before people start getting weirded out.

By the way, the Piece I Would Buy: the portrait above, by (whoda guessed?) Toulouse-Lautrec. Starting price, $20 million.